I’ve been in here a week. Well, around 6 tonight it’ll be a week. I went to the ER about 8:30 am this time last week.
It’s been a strange week. I’ve missed my boys so much. I’ve only seen them once. I just want to cry and scream how unfair life is.
Then I stop. I cry just a little and realize that NO, life is not being unfair. Life is still wonderful.
I’m alive, despite having a blood clot in my lung. I’ve never noticed any pain from this dislocated hip that I apparently have and there is no certainty that the intense back pain was a result of the rods being broken. We don’t know when that happened.
I’m not 100% better by any means. I still don’t know when I’m going home, but I can not and will not let this get me down.
I’m grateful to have found an AMAZING new friend who is baby sitting Nathan so he can stay with me and continue to breastfeed. Daddy is staying with us too, but with Bobbi here Dad can work and still be here for new reports. Thank you, Dances with Chaos, for sharing your friend with me, I instantly saw how amazing she is and why you adore her so much.
I guess there is not much else to say. I’ve come close to really feeling sorry for myself and can see how people slip into depression so easily. Last night I cried a few tears because I wanted ALL my babies here. ALL.
No, I take that back. I wanted to be HOME with all my babies.
This morning I woke up feeling better then I had. Still in pain but with a better outlook. I guess I needed those tears.
The doctors have been absolutely amazing and my day nurses have been very caring. All my techs have been easy going and polite.
The night time staff? Well that is another post entirely. You’ll just have to wait.
I am, however sporting my fun, stylin’ mom hospital gown from Annie and Isabel. I have the “Susan”. It’s comfy and makes me feel like myself; and not like a room number.
Picture of cute hospital gown coming.
As a night nurse, it breaks my heart that your nurses might not be treating you kindly. I have been thinking of you this week and can’t wait to hear that you are on the mend and headed home to be with your family.
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Thanks. I think home is still a long ways away. I haven’t even had surgery yet.
I’m glad things seems a little better! Thinking of you!
Life As Wife´s last blog post ..That Buzzing In My Ear
Thank you
Sometimes you do need a good cry. It’s okay to feel sorry for yourself as long as you don’t allow it to control you. I’ve been setting a timer for 30 mins, and tell myself I can only cry and wallow until the timer goes off. Surprisingly it works. I let some of the emotions out but don’t get sucked into the morass and black hole of despair.
Sorry to hear the night nurses are not very helpful. I hope and pray you get some answers quickly and can go home soon.
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Thanks. Yes, crying helps a lot of stuff.
Oh, man… I hear your pain and can relate, as my hospitalizations have been several hours away from home as well, although thankfully my DD is older. I wish I could offer some advice; instead, I can share my shoulder.
Many hugs coming to you.
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Thanks. I’m forunate that we are only 20 minutes away but with school/work it just doesn’t work for them to see much during the day.
Bless you, sugar, for not letting the world close in on you. We’re thinking of you–got two extra candles going, in fact. Gotta get through it! Uncle Al’s with you!
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(((HUGS)))
I’ve been following along…so sorry this is happening! Any explanation as to WHY the rods would have broken? Did you fall? Was there some sort of blunt force to your back? And now a clot in your lung? No need to answer all my questions, I’m just thinking out loud and feeling frustrated for you! I feel certain you’ve endured enough pain to last a lifetime BEFORE this happened. Please remember you are loved and supported! We’re routing for you to heal and come home to your boys!!
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Hey,
WE are at a loss as to why, when, and how they broke.
I think the clot formed from laying her day in/ day out for so many days.
Thanks for the support.
It’s tough to be in the hospital so long so it’s ok to feel a little sorry for yourself!! Especially when you are missing those cute boys. I hope you get to feeling better soon so you can get out of there and be with your lovely family. So glad you love your “Susan” designer hospital gown:-) It looks fab on your!!
xoxo
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Thank you … it feels great to have it on too!
You are so strong and amazing.
Sometimes a good cry does help, but your ability to keep such an upbeat attitude even with the night staff issues and being stuck there.. you are an inspiration as always.
Glad my friend is working out so well. Told you she was amazing. 🙂
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