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The Wheelchair Mommy

Paraplegic Wife and Mommy

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I have been paralyzed since September 12, 1999. It was my first fall semester at College. I say first FALL because I also took a class over the summer. Yea, I’m a dork. Whatever.

Yes, my injury is permanent and no I do not believe prayer will suddenly heal me and no the doctor’s can’t “fix” “it”. They did what they could to SAVE my life and ensure I would live a HAPPY healthy mostly normal life.

Well, after seeing a few clips by Teal Sherer I thought I’d spice things up a bit. “I was wearing 6″ heels and walking on my sub, when all of a sudden…….” Ok. Not really. Really, people!? I was 18. You think I’d have a sub?! I’d never be allowed to be a dom. Really. Do you know nothing?! Real answer: I was paralyzed in a car wreck and I am now what is considered a L1,2 paraplegic. (L=Lumbar/lower back)

First of all, that is not a question, but I will answer it anyways. I’d rather be HAPPY then feel sorry for myself. Only I can make me happy and I have to live with what I have. It can’t be changed so why be miserable when I can be just as happy if not HAPPIER than the next person?

My feeling fades from the belly button down. When I had my navel pierced, it actually hurt. You can use your imagination and guess how much of what you want to ask I can feel and how much of it I can’t and so forth and so on.

 I wiggle my pants down, transfer and sit. And wait. And wait. JUST LIKE YOU. Sometimes I read. Or tweet. (kidding. …  I would NEVER tweet on the toilet. I might check facebook though. Or upload a picture to instagram . . ) When I am all done a I wipe and transfer back. Duh.

Yes. My van has hand controls. My van does NOT have a cool lift. Those are crazy expensive and take up space in my van. I have too many kids for that waste of space! For now I am healhy and can break my chair down and put it in the passenger seat next to me. Or as of late I am breaking child labor laws and making my 7 year old put it behind the driver’s seat as one of his chores! I kid. I never MAKE him do it. I just bribe him to do it instead.

Because, again, I am young and healthy and do not need one. Plus they are HUGE. My chair in TEENY TINY and fits almost anywhere. I would be way to limited with something that big. Besides, my kids like to “push” me and couldn’t if I had a power chair … maybe when I’m 50?

If by naturally you mean the “old fashioned” way yes. I had lots of crazy monkey sex with my husband, all over the place. on the floor, in the bed …… oh. Sorry. You didn’t want THAT many details. Right!? In all seriousness, this was ACTUALLY the first questions I had for my doctors. Can I still have children? They assured me that in most cases, YES, women who are paralyzed can still conceive. I just had to wait and see if I got my period back. I did. Obviously. Well, at least 3 times. So far.

No. I delivered via Cesarean section. I know there are paralyzed women who have successfully delivered naturally and I desperately wanted to be one of them. HOWEVER, my doctor and I were worried that with the placement of the rods in my spine I may not be able to bare down all the way and push a baby out. I could labor for HOURS and not be able to do it and in the end need a C-section. So we decided I would go in rested and prepared. I have NO regrets.

 I dunno. Maybe. It won’t be for a girl though. It’ll be for a baby.

 I have a shower bench I sit on and shower just like anyone else that’s paralyzed. If I want a bath I get the full princess treatment and DH lowers me in and raises me back out of the tub. Dressing? Sometimes on the bed but usually in my chair with LOTS of wiggling and moving side to side to get pants on. If you are ever out with me and I take FOREVER in the bathroom. THAT IS WHY. It’s not because I’m pooping. I swear. Getting my pants up takes about 1-4 minutes depending on fabric and fit.

oooh you mean like housework? I hire someone. .  . somtimes. In my dreams. Yeah. No. I just do it. You’d have to come and watch. I USUALLY try and make Charlie do the floors. . . I think we are going to hire a maid to come once a week. Someday. Oh and this vacuum is a lifesaver. Want to know why?

I think IT FREAKING SUCKS. I don’t feel sorry for myself any more than you feel sorry for YOURSELF….and you do from time to time, am I correct? Oh, wait. You don’t? Oh. Ok. Neither do I.

I dunno, ask me. I promise I PROBABLY won’t roll over your toes. If I say NO, believe me. OOOH and NEVER EVER jerk a door out of my hands. EVER! ! !! ! Ask me if I want help. DO NOT EVER jerk a door out of my hand. I do not know how many times I have almost fallen out of my chair because someone jerked a door out of my hands….and do not RUN ahead of me to move things, unless you have asked and I say yes please or I ask.   It slows me down. I am EXPERT and gauging if I will fit somewhere so don’t block me. Please.

 I USED to have rods on either side of my spine. They often caused pain, but THEY BROKE and may or may not have caused a horrible infection in my spine that I had treated in early 2012. WE also had to remove the rods, which is how we found the nasty thing. That lead to weeks of misery, I got to shoot up twice a day though. . . with antibiotics. In a PICC line. That was boat loads of fun, even a year later! I can also easily get a pressure sore (bed sore) and my bladder often just up and decides to have a mind of it’s own. I can’t feel it ya know.

 We met online. I lived in Shiner. He loves Shiner beer. You do the math.

Did you REALLY just F-ing ask that question!?

Not yet. I went back in 2001. Developed a horrible pressure sore that put me in the hospital off and then on again for 4 months. Started planning a wedding, enjoying newly wed life and then getting pregnant. I am doing my dream job though. . . I plan to go back at some point. I either want to teach or be a medical student…I mean doctor. For now I will settle with being a Mommy, a teacher and a writer.

Yes

 

 I wheel my weight around all day, every day and load my chair in and out of the van multiple times a day (although will has been helping me with that) and I lift my body to the bed, couch and toilet many times a day as well. I also have a toddler. .. but no. No REAL exercise. I have asthma. LOL

No

I can have sex and I definitely do. I have 2 3 kids, remember?

Comments

  1. Michael @badassdadbl says

    Hey. Just found you via @QueenOfSpain. You kinda rock. I love how honest and straight forward this FAQ is. You could easily have called it "Every you ever wanted to know about the lady in the wheelchair but were afraid to ask." Woody Allen should totally make that movie. Kinda like a sequel. Anyway, hi.

    Reply

  3. mommaruthsays says

    Don't know exactly where I found you from, but I'm following you and I think I'm in love with you already.

    Or your blog, I'm in love with your blog – if that sounds less creepy. 🙂

    Reply

  4. WendyW says

    P, you rock! I can't believe all this time I've known you, and I've never taken the time to read your blog! You've always inspired me….and I am just awe struck by all you do! Love ya, girl!

    Reply

  5. Shawna says

    This was so refreshing to read, I’m going to have to link my mom to your blog, she would love your answers, especially the one about people moving things for you!! LOL she feels your pain!:)

    Reply

  6. Darlagee says

    Hi! My daughter’s a fan of yours. I have a very similar injury and enjoyed reading your blog especially your answer to “Should I help you?” I SO relate! I had already raised my kids when I was injured 6 years ago, but I spend a lot of time with my grandkids and love that I can find ways to do creative things with them. Keep on!

    Reply

  10. one cluttered brain says

    hey! Saw you were featured at 5 fish! Kari is so cool like that.

    And she is right! You do have an infectious smile.

    I used to work in a hospital–Rehab therapy floor as a certified nurses assistant. I LOVED it.

    I totally wanna be a REhab nurse later. all my kids are not in school YET.

    i loved learning more about you.

    It's all in the attitude, you don't have to be miserable just cause you have had rotten luck, it takes WAY more muscle to frown than smile….

    But U already knew that right?

    I have a NEW blog now. WordPress. I still have my blogger one. I wanted to see what all the fuss was about.

    Here's my link if you want it.

    Comes visit me please ?http://vloggingmama.wordpress.com/

    Reply

  13. LZ says

    I love this – what an amazing attitude! I wondered about so many of things you touched on here. Can’t wait to check out the rest…

    Reply

  14. Alyna @ Better Your says

    Your FAQ page is awesome. Really. Brilliant! Honest. Love it. 🙂 Man I wish people didn't call your wheelchair a "thing" – like that diminishes the fact that you are in a wheelchair. Ugh. I hope you inspire others! I'm sure you do… 🙂

    ~ Alyna

    Reply

  15. Kami says

    Priscilla!! I've been reading and nodding my head saying, "Yep, this is the same smart, strong, funny, sweet, butt-kicking chick I remember from UW days!" Love you.

    Reply

  16. Phebe says

    A few months ago I ended up in a wheelchair, (a small one and a big power chair)
    I have a neuromuscular disease (still looking which one)
    My daughters are 6 and 9 years old, and they think I'm the coolest mom ever. (and a happier mom, now she's able to leave the house, and a little less tired all the time)

    Things I sometimes really don't like are:
    – People who think I'm (also) mentaly disabled and talk to me like I'm a 3 month old baby.
    – People who think they should get a medal just for holding the door for me (or a big tip)
    – People who think I'm faking because I look 'normal' or because I can move my legs and (with some support) am able to stand.
    – People who think I'm a bad person and what happened to me was a punishment from God (really, people tell me this)
    – People who think whatever I have is contagious, and they might catch it.
    – People who ask me when I'm getting out of that 'thing' (sometimes followed by: '… and act normal')
    – People who think I can't take care of my kids

    And I love:
    – Babies and Toddlers, especially when they look at you with a face that says:
    * 'Your a little bit too big to sit in a stroller, aren't you'
    * 'Your getting back in the stroller? I'm trying to get out!'
    * 'Cool, a stroller you can move by yourselve'
    – My youngest daughter saying to her friends. 'Yes that's my mom, she in a wheelchair, cool ha'
    – My oldest daughter, who (despite her age) Isn't too embarased to be seen with me, and thinks I'm cool.
    – My husband, for saying 'yes she's in a wheelchair, so what?'

    Reply

  21. Lorna says

    Hello!

    I found you via SITS and your lovely comment on my blog!

    I am a wheelchair user as well, and we same to have the same just-get-on-with-life outlook and humour!

    It’s great to connect with you and I look forward to reading more!

    Lorna
    Lorna´s last blog post ..Found Poetry

    Reply

  25. Kerri says

    Stopping in from SITS!
    Love your list and your honesty! I’m not in a chair at this time, but I was 10 years ago…..I have myasthenia gravis, a neuromuscular disease. When I get too weak I need a wheelchair. I get some of the same dumb questions. Good for you for sharing on this blog and educating and inspiring people!

    Reply

  29. Adrian says

    I like that you answer questions so honestly. However, you kind of missed the one I was wondering about the most. How do you manage tiny children from a wheelchair? I can’t even imagine how you would carry a baby safely and still be able to move a manual chair, or how you can manage to diaper a squirming toddler from a sitting position? Must be hard.

    How long is it before they figure out how to run away from you and wedge themselves in somewhere they know you can’t reach them? I can see a naughty two year old doing that pretty easily. Hopefully this time, it will be easier with your two older children to help you.

    Kids are fun, but they are hard work, even when you have full mobility!

    Reply

    • Deena says

      @Adrian, One of the things that has always amazed me about Priscilla is her ability to mother full time from a wheelchair. Kids really only do what they are allowed to get away with from birth, when they are raised by a mother in a chair, they really know no different. Will is the same age as my daughter, one of the things that originally bonded us together as friends, I remember reading a blog she had done back then about how she gets him in and out of the car when he was an infant. The ability to adapt our lives when we really need to is one of the many things that makes us human.

      Reply

    • Priscilla says

      @Adrian, The first email was direct, this one is a blog reply 🙂

      You manage when you want something bad enough. I am sure there are posts on here that answer how I did those things the first two times.

      I’ve been blessed so far and my kids on ran off once or twice when they first started testing those boundries and I did what other moms did and chased them down, probably faster then one can run. THey have never gone anywhere I couldn’t get them.

      Kids are a blast and they are only hard work when you make them hard work. I make that mistake quite often, but we all parent and learn.

      Thanks for visiting.

      Reply

      • Tara says

        I don’t have kids (yet) but many nephews and now great nieces whom I was around when they were all infants and did a lot of baby sitting (from my chair).. I have big shoulders and could balance the babies perfectly when they were tiny and when they got a bit bigger but weren’t walking yet, I loved overalls because they were easy to pick up.. like a purse and when I had the babies on the floor, I’d put them on a blanket and then scoop them up in it.. some people who didn’t know me would freak.. but never have I dropped a baby and probably picked them up safer than some parents do by yanking on their little arms! Its so true about how you raise kids.. one of my nephews who I helped raise when he was little, never once tried to run away from me when he was young and believe it or not, I never even had issues with temper tantrums.. but I’m pretty sure that’s only because I was the auntie and not the mommy! lol

        Reply

  30. Courtney K. says

    First I want to to offer you a round of applause for your HONESTY 🙂 It’s so refreshing to see people being open and honest about things, and your answers, quite frankly, cracked me up! I love your outlook on life. I think it’s awesome that you keep a great outlook when so many people seem to “expect” you to be different. Love your blog!
    Courtney K.´s last blog post ..To Tell the Truth…or not

    Reply

    • Priscilla says

      @Courtney K., Thank you. You are right. People do expect me to be different and are usually pleasantly surprised when they realize I am just like them. Thank you very much for visiting on my SITS day.

      Reply

  31. Sharon says

    I can’t believe the audacity people have to ask such personal questions. My mother taught me never to ask people questions like some of the ones you get. That would be reserved for a very close friend and then you’d wait until they wanted to tell you. But then I’m in my 50’s and things weren’t as open as they are these days with everyone sharing everything on the internet. It’s great that you can handle it all with such candidness and humor.

    Reply

  33. Jessica says

    I found your blog while perusing through the SITS blog directory and Im so glad I did!! I love your honesty and the way you just power through. Congratulations on your new baby!

    Reply

  34. Elizabeth says

    I think its amazing that you do all that you do. I was wondering though do you have someone that helps you with the kids? I mean in case they run out in the middle of the street? fall down the stairs?

    Reply

  35. Erin says

    I have really enjoyed reading your story and your FAQ’s! Of course, we all have days we feel sorry for ourselves and things we wish we could go back and change…but your positive attitude is so refreshing!!

    I appreciate your honesty!! It helps people like me who never know what I should or shouldn’t do for someone in a wheelchair. I don’t want to be the ‘asshole’ that does the wrong thing. LOL But I never know if I’m the ass for opening the door or not…so I know I appreciate it when someone first hand can just say it! 🙂

    Oh…but I do know that it is BEYOND inappropriate to ask you if you can feel sex! OMG!!! It’s amazing how rude people can be!

    My daughter had a huge, bright red birthmark on her face when she was a baby (until about 2 years old when it started to fade)…I learned then, first hand, how ignorant people are and how strangers somehow find themselves with no boundaries as to what they will say!

    I heard things like “Wow, what an beautiful baby if she didn’t have that awful spot on her face.” Really? You felt that comment was ok to say to a new mom?

    “Is that lipstick?” Yes, because doesn’t everyone put bright red lipstick all over their daughters eye before they go out in public. Again, really? DId you think about that before you said it, or did it just jump out of your mouth before you had a chance to stop it? LOL

    Anywho… thank you for stopping by my blog! Stay positive, it’s such a beautiful attribute!!! I wish you continued happiness!!! 🙂
    Erin´s last blog post ..Laundry-Craft Rooms

    Reply

  36. Gina says

    Hi,

    You have a beautiul family! It’s so nice to meet such a candid fellow SCI Mom. I was injured in ’93 (C5/6 Quadriplegic) and much to the surprise of some, surprisingly positive lol. Paralysis does not = dead.

    Nice meeting you and good luck with the new addition 🙂

    Reply

  37. Amanda says

    I love these! My husband was paralyzed in a car accident 10 years and he (well could say we since they ask me when they are too scared to ask him lol) gets these questions all of the time… it’s great to hear everything from a woman’s point of view though. Congrats on the new baby boy! 🙂

    Reply

  38. Melissa says

    I have met so many wheelchair users and people with various disabilities (from being a Therapeutic Rec student) and one thing I always love/admire about so many of them is the raw sense of humour. I love sarcasm! It’s weird that people think the humour so different, but we all make fun of the things in our lives. I’m now a teacher, and I think if people who aren’t teachers heard me sometimes they’d think I’ve either lost it or hate children. But what else can you do but laugh sometimes! It’s what keeps you sane. 🙂

    But in all seriousness, I think it’s so important that everyone learn wheelchair etiquette, as well as etiquette towards disabilities in general, because some things people do to be ‘helpful’ is not only demeaning but dangerous! Even though some things we think are common sense, humans don’t have quite a good track record for using that now, do they?

    Reply

  39. Laura Tellado says

    Ummm…ROCK ON! Especially the part about people getting in the way to help. No, I don’t think they’re doing it on purpose to be a total NUISANCE, but that’s how they come off most of the time.

    I love your honesty on your FAQ. It took me so many years (and sometimes it still takes a LOT out of me to muster up the courage to be that honest. But it pays off!

    Feel free to stop by my blog, Holdin’ Out for a Hero, and offer your thoughts. I hope to connect with you!
    Laura Tellado´s last blog post ..SBACFL Walk-N-Roll Opportunity for Bloggers!

    Reply

  41. Katie says

    I just found your blog and have enjoyed reading it. My husband has T5-6 paraplegia (also thrown from a vehicle) and gets some of the same questions and such. Someone congratulated him for getting out of his truck by himself the other day… He has the same sort of attitude that you do:) It’s amazing how I also get stupid personal questions as well. “I just don’t see how you do it”, blah, blah, blah. What else are either of us supposed to do???

    Anyway, looking forward to reading more of your blog!

    Reply

    • Priscilla says

      They congratulated him? Seriously? I’d congratulate them on earning the award for most insulting comment of the decade! ha! 🙂 Welcome to my blog 🙂

      Reply

  42. Shasta says

    i just found your blog via The Sweet Shoppe and since I’ve only really been active as of this year I thought I would come over to your blog and learn a little bit about you. I love your attitude about everything. The exercise answer cracked me up. I have asthma too and pull that line all the time as an excuse for not wanting to exercise. You have a beautiful family.
    Shasta´s last blog post ..Two Week Wait

    Reply

  43. Meka says

    Hi Priscilla, I stumbled across your blog and I was encouraged by your story. I am also a disabled mother and when I read about you and your family, I was so impressed by your attitude regarding your disability and just wanted to say that it feels good to know that there are other people who are like me out there in my situation living a normal life . I also get the inappropriate questions and I sometimes just look and I’m like, “really,”” and just shrug it off. I have my good days and bad days but I feel so blessed to be in the position to where I run my own home and take care of my family. I have some friends that still live with relatives and such that always tell me that I’m so lucky which makes me feel kinda sad for them but, I realize that they didn’t have my life experiences. Anyways, thank you for sharing your life with us. You have a beautiful family and keep “pushing” on . You continue to be happy and let no one steal your joy!

    Reply

    • Priscilla says

      Thank you so much for stopping by and saying hello! I love to hear from other moms that don’t let their disability get them down! 🙂

      Reply

  44. Kami says

    You are so freaking awesome! As a woman who’s been in a wheelchair her whole life, everything you wrote is SO true! I have another to add to your list….PLEASE LET YOUR CHILDREN ASK QUESTIONS!!! I cannot tell you the amount of times a child has come up to me to ask why I am using a wheelchair, only to have their parent embarassingly hush them and scurry away. Ugh.

    Anyways, nice meeting you 🙂
    Kami´s last blog post ..Weekend Recap

    Reply

  45. Beena says

    Hi Priscilla, I just found your blog and it was very encouraging for me. I’m in my late 30’s and have been in a wheelchair for the past 1 year and 8 months. I used to be very active but since becoming wheelchair dependent I very infrequently go anywhere. But reading your blog reminded me that it is still possible to live a full life. Thank you. I need to learn to do this despite my disability.
    I recently had a baby 5 1/2 months ago (my first and only one) and didn’t begin baby wearing because if figured that this was for active people that go to various places and take walks with their baby, etc. But now I’m interested in beginnning baby wearing in order to bond with my baby more. (Due to post partum depression for the first 4 months and my well meaning mother “taking over” my baby as if SHE were his mother because she didn’t think that I was capable of taking care of my baby because of my disability. She felt that he wouldn’t be ok unless he was with her all the time. ( He has been a formula fed baby from the beginning.) Needless to say, this led to some serious prolonged postpartum depression because I didn’t have my baby with me (although I was needing him desperately) because he was always in her arms and I was intimidated by the way she had taken control of my baby. Anyway, now I’m trying to re-establish a bond with him and I’m wondering if baby wearing might help since it’s hard for me to hold him for prolonged periods of time. But I’m not sure how he will take to being worn since he’s not used to being worn. Also, my mother got him used to her walking around with him and I cannot do that (although I can stand for short periods of time and take a few steps). He often starts to wiggle as if he’s uncomfortable after I’ve been holding him for a few minutes while sitting. I saw the picture of you wearing your young baby in a sling in the wheelchair. I’m sure you’ve been practicing baby wearing from the newborn period but I was wondering what you thought of me trying to start babywearing now when my son is 5 1/2 months old. Also, what type of baby wearing sling or carrier do you reccomend for someone who is wheelchair dependent who will be sitting whenever they will be wearing their 5 1/2 month old baby? I would love love to hear your thoughts on this since you’re an experience wheelchair user and baby wearer. Thanks!

    Reply

    • Priscilla says

      I stopped around 6 -8 months. The babies just lost interest and wanted freedom at that point!

      Reply

  46. neena says

    i’m not even sure what i was looking for when i came across this post, but i just want to say that i appreciate your candor. my best friend married a para a few years ago and they have an adorable little infant now. i sometimes wonder the questions you addressed, but would NEVER ask her/them…the last thing i want to do is offend her. and i really have no intention of being rude or disrespectful; these are topics i would feel comfortable discussing with people i’d known for ages – and while she and i are close – i don’t want to make her uncomfortable! i’m rambling – anyway, thanks again for sharing!

    Reply

  47. Maxynne Marr says

    Priscilla,
    I am a paraprofessional working with a fourth grade boy who is paralyzed from the waist down. Thus far, his toilet issues have been handled by a regular time to take him and change the Pull Up he still wears. As he is getting older his sense of modesty is increasing. He is definitely able to transfer himself from chair to toilet. Is there anything I can tell him to watch for as a signal he needs to go? He says he has thought about it but doesn’t “feel” anything. Any suggestions would be greatly appreciated.

    Reply

    • Priscilla says

      Timing is a big thing. Just go about every 2-3 hours, more often is you’ve had more to drink, and you can sometimes feel your bladder bulge if you feel the lower abdomen.

      Reply

      • syd says

        ty. I am rapidly losing the ability to feel things below as my diabetes takes more of my feelings. at least it hasn’t taken my eyesight yet. I may have to wear one of them diapers for insurance..

        Reply

  48. Erika says

    Thanks for answering these questions… I can definitely see how they are so personal — even to the point of intrusive, but if I’m honest, I was also curious about some of them myself! Thanks again.
    Erika´s last blog post ..My Blogging BFF

    Reply

    • Priscilla says

      Hi Erika! Thanks for stopping by. You are welcome. I’d rather people know than wonder and assume something that’s not true. 🙂

      Reply

  49. Donna says

    Wow, I just love you, lol I can so relate to everything you say and love your positive attitude and sense of humor :0) I too am a stay at home mommy to 3 in a chair oh and I just happen to be 30 something too 🙂 I little closer to the something though 😉 I look forward to following your awesome blog!

    Reply

  51. Jessica Boehm says

    Wow! you are amazing! Ilaughed the whole way through and will be sharing your page with a friend of mine who was paralyzed earlier this month, he will love it! You are an insiration, and I love love love your great attitude 🙂 my friend will be happy to read this, as he is in pretty good spirits as well!

    Reply

  52. Kristi says

    Hi! I just stumbled across your blog in a fashion linkup from another site. Your story is so inspiring and I love your attitude AND fashion sense! Keep up the great work!

    Reply

  54. Lindsay says

    I freakin’ love you. I laughed out loud and may have thrown in a few AMENs as I was reading.
    My mom is upset that I’m fat AND in a wheelchair…how will I ever find a man?!

    Reply

  55. Dee says

    I just found your blog and really enjoy it. I’m not a mommy but am a wheelchair user and had a question. I recently got downsized and had been working from home, but an opportunity came up to go out to work. What’s stopping me? I can’t figure out how to get re-dressed after using the bathroom. I can’t stand, either, and that’s what has me stumped. Any tips?

    Reply

  56. LisaP says

    I love your attitude. My PT is ordering my wheelchair this week. I have spastic paraplegia and I’m rapidly losing the ability to use my legs. I go for my evaluation for hand controls in my car next week. I’m kind of excited about the new toys even though it sucks. I’ll make sure to keep checking in. I definitely need to go shopping!

    Reply

  57. luis marquez says

    im on a wheelchair since 1998 due to a gun shot wound. I enjoyed reading about you, it had me laughing cus that is what most people ask me all the time and its good to read that someone else goes through the same stuff as well. Thank you for sharing!
    you could check my stand up vid in youtube luis marquez comedy i dont wanna post a link so it wont look like im spaming

    i luv your website. stay Up 🙂

    Reply

  58. Aims says

    I laughed at several points in this. I just got my wheelchair and am dreading going out in public with it. And if you want to hear some rude questions, go out with a service dog. Holy cow, the things people say and do when they see a service dog. It raises rude to a whole new level. Keep up the good work!

    Reply

  59. The Funster says

    Priscilla,
    You are very inspiring, but I’m sure you hear that all the time. You are a very lovely, young woman who is full of life and optimism. I was very impressed with your post, honest, candid, and funny. Keep writing because you definitely are very good at it. I will come back to see any future posts that you may have. Thanks for your post!
    The Funster´s last blog post ..Angry Birds Air Swimmers Review!

    Reply

      • Jonathan M. Sweet says

        Well, did you ever see the TV show M.A.N.T.I.S? A paraplegic scientist builds himself a robotic exoskeleton that allows him to walk by electrically stimulating his muscles. The suit also grants him amazing strength which he uses to fight crime in his city, but prolonged use is shown to causes further damage to his body’s nerves.

        Then there’s the new Batgirl comic book, in which Barbara Gordon, who was left paralyzed by a bullet for many years, is able to walk again after experimental surgery…but suffers from PTSD and a sort of “survivor’s guilt” . Some disability advocates have shown disapproval over this new imagining of the character.

        These are fanciful examples, of course, but as a writer myself I’d appreciate some perspective from someone who knows the score.
        Jonathan M. Sweet´s last blog post ..She-Huk v. Angela

        Reply

  62. kimatsafkhet says

    I love your answers. Your bluntness, your everything. Reminded me of a while ago. I was in a wheelchair, the doctors had told me and my parents I’d never walk again. I was sitting in said “thing” in the zoo, watching monkeys eat. Some older couple walked past me, stopped behind me, and the wife whispered, “Look, a shame, isn’t it, she looks so smart and yet is so disabled. The poor thing, having to sit in that thing!”
    I turned around in my thing and said, “Don’t worry, it’s okay. The thing actually helps me get around.”
    She blushed, again turned to her husband and said, “Well, how was I supposed to know she can speak!”

    Honestly, Priscilla, you are an inspiration; I used to live in San Antonio and I still LOVE Shiner. I wish we’d met in person when I was still “over there”!

    Reply

  63. albert edward houldcroft says

    Hi Priscilla, Love your Blog, love your attitude and the way you see your ‘disability’. Because of your positive outlook on life I would like to ask you a question, but first, permit me to explain why? I am a Fine Artist living in Nottinghamshire (Robin Hood country) in the UK. For many years I had friends in wheelchairs whom I have sadly lost, due to their illnesses and I remember how they were “limited” to what they could and could not do. I am currently researching these kinds of limitations and intend to produce a body of figurative work, mainly sculpture highlighting the fact that paraplegia need not hamper one’s dreams. My first concept relating to this revolves around the image of a little ballerina girl performing on prosthetic legs, so I think this gives you an idea as to how I would like to progress with this theme further. As I said before,because of your positive attitude, I wondered if there were any ‘things’ that you could think of that people in wheelchairs/amputees? would have difficultyin doing? (apart from the obvious). Do you know people who have, or have had dreams of doing something, but their incapability prevents it? I would dedicate my work to people such as yourself and to the friends I once had. I look forward to any reply you may have for me. houldcroft@hotmail.co.uk. Kindest regards. Albert.

    Reply

  64. Madaline says

    This was literally the best FAQ’s I’ve ever read in my whole entire life. I don’t know if you found my blog or I found yours but I’m so happy either way! This kept me laughing the whole time.
    Madaline´s last blog post ..Southern Shorts

    Reply

  65. Lena Holmes says

    I found your blog while I was googling “Wheelchair- how to get him to hold my hand”. I’ve been in a wheelchair for 3 years now due to Spastic Cerebral Palsy. My best friend, also a wheelchair user, and I get #18 all the time and it sucks! This is an amazing blog however, even though I don’t have children. You’re awesome!

    Reply

  67. Terrie says

    Hello there! Would you mind if I share your blog with my twitter
    group? There’s a lot of folks that I think would really enjoy your content.
    Please let me know. Thanks
    Terrie´s last blog post ..Terrie

    Reply

  68. Ahmie says

    I found your website while trying to find tips on cleaning up my in-training mobility service dog’s poop when I’m out by myself.

    I’m also a wheelchair using mama of “more than the average” number of children – I have 4 sons ages almost 2 to 10 years old. My 10 year old really enjoys assembling my new manual wheelchair but since I don’t homeschool that help is only available slightly more often than my husband’s availability. I’ve been a mobility scooter user since 2009 but just got a manual wheelchair in hops of increasing my independence, I can’t get the scooter in/out of my van on my own but I’m struggling to do that with my manual chair also, threw my back out trying. The mobility scooter has a parenting-small-ones advantage of being faster than I’m capable of self-propelling as well as keeping one hand free (only need one hand to power/steer the thing) but I’ve also inadvertently run over my kids’ feet so many times when they don’t notice I’m backing up that I hate taking it to places where there are a lot of other kids – plus the maneuverability of a manual wheelchair is far superior in tight spaces. My scooter’s turning radius is greater than 40 inches, which makes even navigating many clothing shopping venues problematic.

    I’m not paralyzed or an amputee, I have hypermobility syndrome and my major joints slip out of place very easily and painfully, particularly my kneecaps and pelvis. Oh my goodness the pity and paternalism I have to deal with just to go to get some pool time at the YMCA sometimes is enough to make me want to scream. And of course, since I only have sons I get the “are you going to try for a girl” or “are you disappointed you didn’t get a girl” question coupled with the astonishment that I have “so many” children. I get snarky about it sometimes – my current favorite response is that I’m breeding my future sedan chair bearers. Yes, I do want one more child, but that’s because I want five children, not because I have my hopes pinned entirely on having “the girl” – though I do joke that having four boys first was Mother Nature’s way of trying to convince my husband to have the fifth kid I want. I’ve been in pain every day of my life since I was 10 years old, the only regrets I have are waiting so long to make the realistic and logical physical adaptions to my disability. For instance, I didn’t get a handicap placard until after I finished my BA and didn’t get the mobility scooter until I started graduate school, and both have so dramatically increased what I’m able to get accomplished with the amount of energy my pain-disrupted sleep and slippy joints allow me to have. I finished my MA (in Sociology, primary focus is family development/socialization processes but with quite a bit of medical sociology in the mix) in May 2013, with my not-quite-six-month-old 4th child exclusively breastfeeding through my last semester.

    I’ve been getting nudged for a while to write a quasi-advice book on parenting with disabilities. I would love to include your voice & experiences in this endeavor.

    Reply

      • Ahmie says

        I saw an email to contact you somewhere, I’ll send an email to make contact regarding the book – it’s in very preliminary stages right now. It looks like you’ve got some other regulars on here that are disabled parents, I would be happy to have as many voices of experience as possible.

        Oh, and I love your profile picture! 🙂

        Reply

  69. Sydney says

    Hi, I am writing a book about a paralyzed girl and your site really helped me understand what actually happens when you are in a wheelchair for the rest of your life! I think you are amazing and I love your story!

    Reply

  70. Lorraine says

    I am so glad I stumbled across your website! I am a t-10 paraplegic have so many questions but there isn’t as much information on women with spinal cord injury as there is men. I was hit by a car at age 3 in 1983 and it has been some journey! Would love to pick your brain and ask more questions at a later time. Thank you so much for sharing! I think you are Amazing!

    Reply

    • Priscilla says

      Hi Lorraine!

      If you like my FB page you can chat with me there. It is very similar to chatting with a FB friend on messenger.

      Reply

    • Phindile Nzimande says

      Hi ladies im glad i can finally chat to women going through what I’m going through , im a T8 fell over a balcony in 2013 i just turned 28 im married n have a 7 month old but im still battling with the transfers or maybe it’s just an excuse coz my hubby gets helpers 4 me but I really want to be independent gonna try more anyways im so happy finally

      Reply

        • Terri says

          Hi Priscilla,
          I like looking at food blogs and put in paraplegic blogs and was happy to find yours. I’m a quadrapalegic but have a lot of arm motion and as Lorraine mentioned you can’t find many women in ou situation like men. It’s only been a year for me so I hope to someday move around like you do. Plus I’m just over 50 but was very fit before this happened. How long did it take you to be able to move around like you do. I have a fb page but haven’t updated it a terrible the accident. I will friend you and any other Para or quad. I could use all the help I can get!

          Reply

  71. Jennifer says

    HI! I’m really glad I ran into your site. My fiancé is also paralyzed (T3 break) and he’s been looking for good information on how others go about their day with the known(and unknown) limitations.
    You’re pretty great to make up a page and share experiences and just the person you are with people online. Pretty sweet!

    Reply

  73. Anneke Scholten says

    Hi, I love your humor. I use it all the time. It’s the best way of coping with whatever you deal with. (I have MS) I came across your site because I was looking for wheelchair suitable fashion. But your FAQ’s have made my day 🙂 well next to some other fun things such as our huge cat that’s snoring so loud I can’t hear myself typing 🙂
    Greetings from Calgary

    Reply

  75. Erika Sauerwein says

    Hello this is the first time I read your blog. You have inspired me to love myself more. I need to ask how do you transfer from your wheelchair to the toilet and vice versa when you have your period? I’ve never used a tampon and I’m not sure if I can put one due to my neurophathy. Do you have any suggestions or ideas to help me. Please I need advice. Thank you.

    Reply

  76. Terri says

    Hi Priscilla, I wrote you some questions but didn’t get a reply back. You probably are too busy. I signed up for your blog but haven’t gotten anything yet in my emails or overlooked it. You are real inspiring!
    Terri

    Reply

    • Priscilla says

      If you signed up to receive my blog via email, there should have been a confirmation email. When did you sign up and when did you send me questions? Sorry I missed them!

      Reply

  77. anonymous says

    Hi I am so excited I found your website, I really found you by mistake, while I was researching on Google for something else, Anyhow I am here now and would just like to say kudos for a fantastic post and a all round enjoyable blog (I also love the theme/design), I don’t have time to go through it all at the minute but I have bookmarked it and also added your RSS feeds, so when I have time I will be back to read a lot more, Please do keep up the awesome work.

    Reply

  79. Cheyanne Collins says

    My Husband Allen was paralyzed from the waist down from a car accident. Sometimes When I am helping him HE gets So Frustrated with me that he starts yelling that I can’t do it right and that I don’t understand. I always do the best i can and if I need help I call my Mother who is a nurse. But she’s been working a lot lately so I have been on my own. Is there anything I can tell him or that he can tell me so that we can better what each other is going through. and how to deal with people out in public because that makes him madder than anything when they start commenting about why he’s in a wheel chair or why I am with him. Any advice would be great.

    Reply

    • Priscilla says

      Stop helping. Wait for him to ask. His independence is important and believe it or not he can do all things for himself. If his injury is new he may still be working towards this but he can be ENTIRELY independent again.

      Reply

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